


Gratitude

by Lothiriel84



Series: Happiness Inc. [9]
Category: MarsCorp (Podcast), The Bunker (Podcast)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Banter, Crossovers & Fandom Fusions, Flirting, I Don't Even Know, Innuendo, M/M, Mild Language
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-09-25
Updated: 2018-09-25
Packaged: 2019-07-17 14:39:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 740
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16097711
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lothiriel84/pseuds/Lothiriel84
Summary: In the middle of a big tornadoOn the tip of everyone's tongueIn the belly of a giant whaleAll the girls just want to have fun





	Gratitude

“Hello, handsome.”

He spun around, half expecting some random bloke to have materialised at his side over the past few seconds. As that didn’t appear to be the case, he reluctantly turned back to find out who in Coke’s name had just had the nerve to address him that way.

The young woman in a buzz cut peering over his table seemed completely unperturbed by his death glare; she shot him a friendly grin and pointed at the chair opposite his own. “Mind if I join you?”

“My – friend will be here any minute now,” he muttered as politely as his waning patience allowed him to, which wasn’t very.

“Oh, I don’t mind,” she grinned once more, turning the chair around so that she could sit backwards on it. “We can have twice the fun, if you catch my drift.”

“My, ahem, boyfriend, I meant,” he rattled off, very nearly choking on the term that felt thoroughly alien to him; he resisted the urge to throw his drink in her face, clutched at the edge of the table for good measure.

“Cool. Is he as handsome as you are?”

“I’m – most definitely not _that_ ,” he spluttered in utter disgust, mentally cursing Dave for being this inexcusably late. All he wanted was to have a few drinks in peace, without having to go through the hassle of murdering anyone – was that too much to ask?

“Hey, no need to be coy,” she winked, suggestively. “I can _handle_ both of you, I promise.”

“Oh, for the love of,” he grumbled between himself, biting down the expletive at the last moment. Just how dumb all those Martians were, that they couldn’t take a hint if it was written on a signpost hitting repeatedly them in the face?

“I see you’ve made a new friend,” a familiar voice made itself heard at length, amusement dripping through its tone. “Shall I leave you two to it?”

“For Coke’s sake, Dave, I was beginning to think you’d been ambushed by mercenaries or something.”

“I’m not even fifteen minutes late, darling,” he smirked, the idiot – all fake innocence and teasing. “Now, are you going to introduce me to your lady friend, or do I have to do it myself?”

“Dawn Cox,” the young woman cut in, flashing Dave another of her revoltingly cheerful smiles. “I see now why your sweetheart would be so horribly jealous of you.”

“What can I say,” Dave retorted with a grin of his own. “My good looks are the blessing and bane of my existence.”

She laughed, and stood up. “See you around, gorgeous – both of you.”

With that, she finally buzzed off, leaving David to heave a sigh of relief. “I swear, this bunch of morons are starting to really get on my nerves.”

“You’ve been saying this exact same thing ever since day one,” Dave pointed out, even as he reached across the table to steal a sip of his drink. “Even Tom has long stopped paying any attention to your repeated threats of mass murder.”

“Get your own drink, you,” David protested immediately, snatching the glass back from him.

“If you say so, _sweetheart_.”

“Use that word again, and you’re sleeping on the floor for the rest of the forever.”

“Hmm, I might even take Miss Cox up on her proposition.”

He paused, glaring down his glass of Bloody Martin as if it had personally offended him. “Don’t let me stop you, _darling_ ,” he sneered, pushing his chair back as he prepared to leave.

“Oh for pity’s sake, David,” Dave anticipated him, his fingers closing around his wrist quite more forcefully than he would have expected. “Can’t you behave like a normal human being, and take a bloody joke for once?”

“If that was a joke, then Tom is a prize-winning comedian,” he retorted immediately, prying his wrist away from his grasp, yet making no further attempt to stalk out of the room.

“Drama queen,” Dave mocked him back, almost daring him to contradict his statement. “I think I’ll have a Martian Sandstorm, what do you think?”

“I think your taste in drinks is atrocious.”

“As opposed to my taste in sexual partners?”

David took a long sip of his drink, placed the empty glass back onto the table. “That one’s just as awful, if not actually worse.”

“Well, at least yours is truly excellent,” Dave grinned, unrepentant, and signalled to the waiter that he was ready to order.


End file.
